Say something about gay babies.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
