Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
She tied me up with her honor cords...
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize