woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I wish i was in the wii world.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
