I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
