I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
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