I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
