My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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