i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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