Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
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