I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
