She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize