? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Randomize