i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
