He kissed a someone with a penis
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Randomize
