just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
