oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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