Taylor Swift is so right about you.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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