1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
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