What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
You can't special order awesome
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
