absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Randomize
