I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Randomize
