just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
