turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
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