I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize
