I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Randomize
