Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
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