she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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