No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Randomize
