I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
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