I just made out with a guy for $7.
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Randomize
