No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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