The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Randomize
