so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
i dont even know how to be here
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
they're like a gay fantastic four
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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