And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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