You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
i need to put some appletini on your dick
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize