ya dads aren't the best wingmen
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
