Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize
