So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize
