we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
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