Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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