Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
my dad came in to wish me a happy birthday and found me passed out in my underwear with the lights on and a plate of meat on the bed. i bet he was proud to have contributed to my creation in that moment.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize