so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Randomize
