So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
