We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
