C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
