Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Randomize
