I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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