I think I died a long time ago.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize
