She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
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