so that wasnt chicken after all
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Randomize
