You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Randomize
