I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
