no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
Randomize
