as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Randomize